With every new phase of life you learn something new. You gain the expertise through experience.But when we share the experience, comparison comes into picture.I am talking about motherhood. A new mom is told many things and one of the most common lines you would have heard is “my baby never did that”.
Well I am not generalising but people instead of making it easier for the new mother somewhere become the reason for her worries. Instead of finding comfort the new mom ends up feeling there is something wrong with the baby or with her.
There are few things no one tells the new mom but I believe she should know
It is completely normal for a baby to cry. There is nothing like he/she cries a lot or little. Turn a deaf ear when people tell you that your baby cries a lot or why is your baby so silent we don’t get to hear his cries.
Babies have baby skin
The newborn skin is sensitive and changes after few days. While in your tummy, the baby was floating in fluids and once out the skin takes time to normalise. There might be few spots which usually will fade away on its own.Till the time it fades away or even stays there as a beauty spot, just ignore people telling anecdotes about such marks.
Newborns lose weight
Babies lose weight in the 1 week after birth. They generally weight is regained by your love (breast milk or formula).
Every mother worries about sleep patterns
You are going to crib that your baby doesn’t sleep much and the moment he sleeps for a longer duration, you will check every 15 minutes to see if he is breathing. Every mother (new or old)does that.
New moms are overprotective
It is completely normal to be overprotective about your baby. This is a normal instinct that humans and animals have.
Comfort varies from baby to baby
You should do your best to soothe your baby in a position the baby is comfortable in. Even if he/she finds your lap to be most comfortable so let it be. My baby didn’t sleep on the bed for almost 20 days after birth. He preferred my lap. There were people who suggested that this would become a habit and will trouble me in the long run. But honestly at that moment all I wanted was to comfort my newborn.
Don’t feel ashamed
When your baby cries and you have no clue why is he crying please don’t feel ashamed. Babies know only one emotion that is crying.
You will continue to sport a bump
Your bump will stay for a while after delivery. The uterus will take some timeto shrink back to its normal shape.
Many mothers cannot breastfeed
Your breastfeeding capabilities is not a measure of how good a mother you are/will be.
Your body and baby connect
If you are breastfeeding, don’t worry when people ask if you are producing enough milk. You will get to know if your baby is hungry. Your body is also very capable of producing milk according to demand.
Size doesn’t matter
The size of your breasts don’t matter. Milk production is completely hormonal and depends on the baby’s requirement.
No solids before 6 months
Babies should be exclusively breast-fed or formula-fed till they are 6 months. Water is not required as formula and breast milk have enough water.
Milestones are achieved at different times
Every Baby has a different speed of reaching the milestones. It is perfectly normal for some babies to hit them late or early.
You will bleed post-delivery
After delivery there is heavy bleeding. No sanitary pads days are yet not over, once the initial bleeding stops you are again free from periods for a few months. This varies from on person to person. Generally, as long as you exclusively breastfeed, there is little chance of having a menstrual cycle. This is the nature’s own way to maintain gap between kids and that is amazing.
Healthy lifestyle is a must
Eat healthy and get some exercise to adopt a healthy lifestyle for you and your family. Ignore everyone around you who ask about getting back to pre-pregnancy shape.
Most wonderful thing
Lastly, remember becoming a mother is one of the most wonderful feeling on this earth. The first time is special. Don’t ruin it because people around say something which they think is right for your kid. Make your experience special and save the memories. There will be lows and highs and you will soon move on.
Talk to a new mom
Once you are past the new mom stage, please don’t be like the people I have discussed above. Next time you see a mother in distress just assure her it is normal. Let her know how wonderful she is.