Mother’s Day Celebration on your mind? This writer talks about her wonderful mother and why she will miss celebrating this special day.
This year I am overwhelmed at the thought of a Mother’s Day celebration, not because I am planning something extravagant for my mom but because I don’t have her with me to celebrate. I lost my mom two months back and this mother’s day seems a bit of a challenge for this disconsolate daughter.
I understand the usual mother’s day tradition of flowers and gifts isn’t feasible anymore so I am using this post as an ode to my smart mom who taught me EVERYTHING!
My smart mom taught me:
1# To stay calm
Imagine growing up in a house where there’s music everywhere. My mother had a radio player in every room of the house including the kitchen. The minute she woke up, the music switched on and there was a sense of calmness in the whole house. I can’t remember seeing her anxious ever. Unlike my mother, I am not nearly as calm a person as my mother (not by a long shot). But from her, I learned to dissolve my worries with music. Scientifically speaking, music is found effective in improving creative and communication skills in a person. It also reduces stress hormones like cortisol. Now, I listen to my favorite radio station while travelling and writing. Admittedly, I am a calmer and more relaxed person.
2# To stay humble
Mom was a humble and loving woman. All my friends found her to be much better company than me and she was, she sure was. The education I got, the fulfilling career I have today, the milestones I achieved – nothing would have been possible if mom wasn’t working her magic behind the scenes. Even in her last days, she showed humility when a terrible ailment was taking away her strength. I still remember how humble she was in the final days of her life. She expressed her desire to help those around her, and she had the utmost respect for the caregiver who looked after her. She taught me to shape my life the same way.
3# To be loving
My son is a multi-talented child and he is doing well in academics as well as extra-curricular activities. His achievements had earned me many compliments. All the elders in our family appreciate his good manners. However, during my mom’s illness, I inadvertently neglected him and this led to a drastic change in his behavior. My docile child turned into quite the prankster and one day at his Nani’s house, he covered the bedroom walls with drawings of Doraemon and Nobita.
I was at my wit’s end and I gave him the scolding of a lifetime. Mom heard the scream-fest and she sat me down to remind how patient she was with me when I was growing up. Imagine a mother who never yelled at her child, not once (I am not making this up! She really was that calm, loving and patient!). She made me realize that this was my son’s cry for attention and that I need to be more present for him. As for the walls, she reminded me they had used Berger easy clean paint for home so her little Picasso’s artwork would be wiped clean in no time.
I had just learned driving but I wasn’t a confident driver yet. It was a warm Friday morning and I was driving to college when I bumped right into the car in front me. I panicked and vowed never to drive again. I will never forget what my mom did next.
4# To never back down
This is my favorite mom story, which I have told and retold countless times. I had just learned driving but I wasn’t a confident driver yet. It was a warm Friday morning. I was driving to college when I bumped right into the car in front me. (The other car was parked! Don’t roll your eyes. I told you I am a no-good-terrible-driver!)
I experienced the kind of panic that cannot be described in words and vowed never to get behind the wheel EVER AGAIN! Come next morning, I see mom holding the car keys and pushing me to take her to temple. I didn’t peg her as the overtly religious type. On this particular occasion, however, she wouldn’t take no for an answer. The temple she wished to go to was a few kilometers away and I begged her to go with someone else. Long story short, I drove us to the temple and all my fear of driving and otherwise evaporated. The memories, on the other hand, are still concrete.
5# To stay positive and strong
My mother was struggling with her illness for a very long time, but did anyone see her lose her patience or hope? NEVER! My ode to my smart mom would be incomplete if I didn’t share how positive and strong she was even in the midst of tremendous suffering. She would celebrate birthdays and festivals like never before. Not a day went by when she wouldn’t crack jokes to make others laugh. She would play down her problems so that we would not worry too much.
She asked me every single day:
“Did you eat anything or just started working on an empty stomach?”
“Are you taking care of your back problem?”
“Is your work going well?”
My smart mom knew how to be strong enough to care for others, even when it was she who needed care the most.
Summing it all up
The life we have is the result of endless hard work put in by our dear mothers. They give us a listening ear 24 X 7 and we tend to take their efforts for granted. This Mother’s Day, I miss my smart mom more than I could have imagined but the lessons she taught will stay with me forevermore. I wish to live a life that’ll make her proud. To end with, I’d like to share a famous, poignant quote. “My mother taught me everything, except how to live without her.”
Featured Image Credit: Pixaby
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